Brokenness

A couple of weeks ago, I had the opportunity to talk with one of the younger girls who lives in my house. It was a conversation that broke my heart and that was unlike any other conversation I'd ever had with her. This girl has a very special place in my heart. She arrived at Ninos in July, while I was still on my summer vacation in the States. Just minutes after we met, she was already holding my had. She has this infectious smile and you just can't help smiling back when you see it. This girl is the very essence of joy and light. But the night that we talked in my room, I saw a completely different side of her. Earlier in the day, we were busy getting the house decorated for Christmas. I noticed that she wasn't helping with the decorating and that she looked sad. Later, she found me and told me she wanted to talk about why she was sad. I invited her to my room and she laid down on my bed and began to talk. She didn't stop talking for almost an hour. Her eyes were wet, her face was covered with tears, and her smile was missing. This precious little girl laid on my bed, pouring out her heart to me. She must have told me every single memory she has of her mom, her brother, and her baby sister. It was the first time I had really heard her story and after hearing it, I don't know how she can be so smiley all of the time after some of the things she has experienced. Her story concluded with this: "One day, my mom said that she loved me and she promised that she would never, ever leave me. She didn't come home from work that day ..." Her voice broke and I could see the question in her eyes, "Did my mom ever really love me?" I hugged her and tried my best to assure her of her mother's love and of God's perfect love. We prayed together and her sobs quieted. The truth is that God is the only one who can answer those questions and bring the healing that she needs. Her brokenness made me think about a lot of things ... Have we ever really been broken like that and completely vulnerable to God? Have we ever looked with fear in our eyes and the question, "Does God really love ME?" No matter what happens, His love for us is constant and unconditional. He is waiting to scoop us up into His arms and heal the hurt.